DC world observations: Acceptance

As we continue living in this strange and surreal DC world, life BC – any kind of normality – seems a distant memory. What strikes me this week is the importance of acceptance. This is the current situation we find ourselves in, and railing against it costs energy and contentment. We have already considered in these past weeks the importance of regular reflection time to process all our feelings, creating structure and routines, and tools to help deal with our swinging emotions and keep us grounded. These are important building blocks to allow us a sense of control and structure to otherwise vastly altered lives. 

So this week, what if you accept that this is how we are living and choose to make the most of it?

What does acceptance open up to you?

On a recent coaching webinar, I heard the great quote:

Never let a good crisis go to waste.”

Now that is NOT to diminish the crisis. Covid-19 and the extensive and wide reaching fallout is truly awful, with devastating loss of life and health, and catastrophic financial and economic consequences. 

But within this season, there are opportunities. 

Opportunities to stop and take life a bit slower.

– if you are not a key worker. If you are, huge and heartfelt thanks. Life for you is busier and more challenging than ever, and your perspective will be very different. 

But for those of us who are at home, working or not, much of normal life is on hold and there are pockets of extra time. No commute to work. No clubs, social events, shopping trips. 

Acceptance is about seeing the time that we DO have and how we can make the most of it. 

Opportunities to reassess what we do and why we do it.

Never has there been a better opportunity to look at the basics of what you value. When many of the things that we can keep busy with, gain our identity from, or numb/distract ourselves with are taken away, what is left? 

Ask yourself: what am I missing? What am I not missing? What am I seeing and learning about myself?

And what does that then show you about what is most important to you? More on core values here if you want to read more on this. 

The possibility of less structured and busy time with the family you live with.

This of course brings it’s own challenges, especially where there is tension and difficulty. But I am acutely aware in our own house of huge gratitude for this time we have together. I have a choice to expend energy on getting frustrated at what is not happening, and the losses and disappointments. Or I can choose acceptance of the time and space we have to enjoy each other’s company, and make precious memories for years ahead. 

Looking for new ways to do things.

Many of the ways we do things that we take for granted are gone. Again, we have a choice here. We can lament that and rage against the frustrations of this. Or we can choose to see this as a remarkable opportunity in certain areas to start from scratch. Re-write the way we do things, think creatively and laterally. Gain greater efficiency and effectiveness in how we work perhaps. Or stop doing things altogether that we did simply because we were stuck on a loop. 

Opportunities for self development.

This is the way life is just now. There is nothing we can do to speed up the end of this. Very little is within our control. All this can lead to a reactive, helpless mindset that fuels anxiety and fear. 

Or…

Acceptance of this current situation opens up the way for us expend energy that previously went into frustration into proactive living. 

So this week, ask yourself these questions:

• What does choosing acceptance and making the most of this time mean for me?
• How can I use this time to invest in my own development?
• What am I learning about how I previously lived BC? Am I living the life I want to be living?
• What changes can I make?
• What new habits and rhythms can I develop that will take me into life AC (after Corona)
• Who do I want to BE to others in this? What do I want to be known for?
• What skills and strengths do I have that I can use to the full NOW to benefit others?

If we are to not let this time go to waste but use the opportunities presented to the full, then the acceptance of what IS rather than frustration at what ISN’T is key. 

This is a great quote that sums this up beautifully:

Radical acceptance helps you conserve energy that you would have spent fighting with yourself or the world over what is, and gain clarity about what you actually need and how to get it.”

From an article called Accepting the Reality of COVID-19 written by a mental health counselor.

We do not know what tomorrow, let alone next week will hold.

But we do know that TODAY is what we have. We cannot control much of this but we can control our response to what is happening. 

     We can choose to be fully present to ourselves,  to those around us and to each moment.

To practice gratitude and see what IS and what we CAN do.

     And to embrace opportunities to learn about our selves and what is most important, grow our skill set, and develop life giving practices that will do use well into the future. 

Whatever that looks like.