How do I step out of my comfort zone?

What first steps are you needing to take, and yet stalling on? What is on the outside of your comfort zone that you are longing to get to?

Last week I was musing on finding the right path in life, and some of the challenges associated with that. One of those challenges is when we know where we want to get to, but the path is unclear. We simply cannot see how we would move forward towards where we want to go. And therefore, what often happens is that we stay put – stuck, going round in circles, staying on the same spot.

Choosing to remain in the life that we are currently living, even though we know it to be a sort of compromised half-life. Comfortable, perhaps complacent, not too stretching. But far far removed from the life to the full that we desire in our inner beings.

Choosing to remain in the job that drains the life out of us because whilst we know we want to do something different, we have no idea how to get there and there is no obvious path to that destination.

Choosing to not start a project that has been growing, smouldering, bubbling away in side us for ages – be it to write a book, learn a new skill, take on something new at work, volunteer for something, renovate the house. But the absence of a clear path to take to get there is paralysing us into staying put – how could we step so far out of our comfort zone in the absence of clear direction? So our desires and dreams remain unvoiced, unfulfilled, unexpressed.

Choosing to not address our health and well being because the path not only seems unclear but too overwhelming and with far too many huge obstacles – often of our own making? – in the way. So we stay put, remaining discontent and frustrated.

Choosing to continue living in a relationship where both parties are behind barriers that have been there for years – unvoiced needs, assumptions and expectations, learned and entrenched negative patterns of behaviour.

[lots more on relationships here if you are looking to explore this further].

Ooh this is all a bit grim for a mid week read.

Maybe I’ll just stay put in my comfort zone, with my head under the duvet.

But folks, this is serious stuff. Life is short. Life is precious. And we only get one shot at it.

This quote keeps going round in my head, shared here a few weeks ago:

Don’t fear failure. Fear being in the exact same place next year as you are today.”

Often, the path to where we want to go is not clear. It would be lovely if it was indeed all laid out before us, with clear sign posts and distance markers, refreshment stalls along the way to keep us energised and resourced, cheering fans encouraging us along at the tricky bits where we run out of motivation or need help round obstacles. And even twinkly lights along the path lighting the way for us.

Just imagine.

But in our imagination that will remain, as the reality of life is far removed from this.

So what to do? We know we need to take that first step anyway, often in the absence of a clear idea of what the second step is. We take that first step trusting that the next step will become clear. But this is hard and takes much courage and determination.

How do we take that first step out of our comfort zone when it feels like there is so much stacked against us? What tricks and tools are there that can make this easier? This is what we will muse on next week.