Catriona Futter – Equip For Life Coaching Becoming your best self and living life to the full – 07713 974138

Don’t look back in anger (cue for a song….)

Look back...

Look back…

How do you look back at your past life experiences? What lenses are you wearing and how do they affect how you see?

I have been doing a fair bit of musing and reflecting of late on how I got to where I am now. This has in part been prompted by goals I have set myself for this year. And in turn, these goals have grown out of my experiences of the last few years, and what I want there to be more or less of in this coming year. The soul weariness I spoke of a year ago, an understanding of good boundaries and appropriate rest, and the importance of continuing to learn and develop as a life coach have all prompted an unusual-for-me degree of introspection and reflection.

Recently I was listening to a radio programme about whether we are glass-half-full or half-empty people, and how this affects our perception of event.

This struck a chord.

My life has changed hugely in the past 15 years. And how I look back over those years has a huge impact on my view of the future, and expectations thereof.┬áIf I allow the impact of MB’s depression, plus my own experiences of soul weariness and over busyness to be the lens through which I look at life thus far, what tends to dominate is regret and sadness at the hard stuff, the things missed, the struggles. And therefore this clouds how I look forward to this year – expectations clouded by negativity and pessimism.

But it need not be thus. We can learn to look back through a different lens.

At no point 15 years ago, even in my wildest dreams, would I have believed that I would be running my own coaching business at this point, with the fulfilment, challenges, joys, freedom and flexibility that this life brings. And I am where I am now because of so many things coming together over the years – opportunities, conversations, huge support from family and friends, MB believing in me, self awareness and growth, access to great training and learning, financial provision. So much to celebrate and be thankful for.

Thus I change the lens on how I look back, and the over-riding emotion is gratitude. And looking back with gratitude changes how I view the present and the future, and I look forward with hope and optimism because I see what is possible. Change can happen.

It’s a simple formula, and nothing to do with the Oasis song that is buzzing round in my head –

Look back with regret and only see the negative, and you will more likely

look forward with fear and pessimism

Look back with gratitude and see and acknowledge the positive, and you

look forward with hope and optimism.

This is not to diminish difficult life events and circumstances. We learn most through the hard stuff. But we learn, we let go, and eventually we move on and the negative then loses it’s power. We can then focus more on the positive and see all that is good.

How do you look back at life, and how does that affect how you look forward?

Inspired? Encouraged? Get in touch!

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